[14] My uncle's house had gardens
attached, into which I could go if I liked; but I was also at liberty to
roam all over the neighbourhood, if only I obeyed the strict rule of the
house to return punctually at the time appointed. Here I drank in fresh
life-energy in long draughts; for now the whole place was my playground,
whereas formerly, at home, I had been limited to our own walls. I gained
freedom of soul and strength of body.
The clergyman who taught us never interfered with our games, played at
certain appointed playgrounds, and always with great fun and spirit.
Deeply humiliating to me were the frequent slights I received in our
play, arising from my being behind boys of my age in bodily strength,
and more especially in agility; and all my dash and daring could not
replace the robust, steady strength, and the confident sureness of aim
which my companions possessed. Happy fellows! they had grown up in
continual exercise of their youthful boyish strength. I felt myself
exceedingly fortunate when I had at length got so far that my
schoolfellows could tolerate me as a companion in their games. But
whatever I accomplished in this respect by practice, by continual effort
of will, and by the natural course of life, I always felt myself
physically deficient in contrast with their uncramped boyish powers.
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