I approved of it in theory, but my spirit stood
aloof from the practice. I saw and was convinced that the elect of
God would be happier, and purer, were the wicked and
unbelievers all cut off from troubling and misleading them, but if
it had not been the instigations of this illustrious stranger, I
should never have presumed to begin so great a work myself.
Yet, though he often aroused my zeal to the highest pitch, still my
heart at times shrunk from the shedding of life-blood, and it was
only at the earnest and unceasing instigations of my enlightened
and voluntary patron that I at length put my hand to the
conclusive work. After I said all that I could say, and all had been
overborne (I remember my actions and words as well as it had
been yesterday), I turned round hesitatingly, and looked up to
Heaven for direction; but there was a dimness come over my eyes
that I could not see. The appearance was as if there had been a
veil drawn over me, so nigh that I put up my hand to feel it; and
then Gil-Martin (as this great sovereign was pleased to have
himself called) frowned, and asked me what I was grasping at.
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