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Hogg, James, 1770-1835

"The Private Memoirs and Confessions of a Justified Sinner"

Oh, that the earth would swallow me
up, or the hill fall and cover me! Farewell for ever!
September 7, 1712.--My devoted, princely, but sanguine friend
has been with me again and again. My time is expired and I find a
relief beyond measure, for he has fully convinced me that no act
of mine can mar the eternal counsel, or in the smallest degree
alter or extenuate one event which was decreed before the
foundations of the world were laid. He said he had watched over
me with the greatest anxiety, but, perceiving my rooted aversion
towards him, he had forborne troubling me with his presence. But
now, seeing that I was certainly to be driven from my sanctuary
that night, and that there would be a number of infernals watching
to make a prey of my body, he came to caution me not to despair,
for that he would protect me at all risks, if the power remained
with him. He then repeated an ejaculatory prayer, which I was to
pronounce, if in great extremity. I objected to the words as
equivocal, and susceptible of being rendered in a meaning
perfectly dreadful; but he reasoned against this, and all reasoning
with him is to no purpose.


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