As for myself, fine weather, flower-filled lanes, sturdy walks, and
the zest of environs that aroused the rest of the family through
association as well as loveliness, seemed to awaken in my mind a vivid
era that was exciting if laborious. I had night-vigils which were
delightfully entertained by a faculty for hearing quite splendid
music,--music that my imagination composed with a full orchestra of
admirable brilliancy; and I was also able to see in perfect
distinctness a splendid bazaar, filled with any quantity of toys,
which I could summon at will. But this pastime required a great deal
of will-power, a peculiar subtlety of condition, and could only be
kept up for a few moments at a time; and in the course of several
months the charming capacity was modified to that of being able to
evoke most clearly scenes where imaginary characters, more real than
actual companions, leaped into being, and talked and moved to any
extent. I suppose numbers of people have this faculty, and it is a
sovereign protection against ennui; or would be, if remedies could
always be relied upon. I mention these matters to prove that I
moderately possessed artistic perception. I can see, nevertheless,
quite well, that I must have been a very stupid child most of the
time, and that the befogged state of my mind was certainly a pity and
perhaps a shame. Yet there was a sort of advantage in it: fogs choose
with much good sense what they will emphasize; and the intellect
bereft of fussy clearness may have a startling grasp that reminds one
of occult methods.
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