I will not; I will not. I love
her--love her--love her. With the best that there is in me, I love her. Am
I such a coward that I cannot face even my own weaknesses?"
XVIII.
HOWARD EXPLAINS HIS MACHINE.
In August Marian and Mrs. Carnarvon came to the Waldorf for two days.
Howard had offered to show them how a newspaper is made; and Mrs.
Carnarvon, finding herself bored by too many days of the same few people
every day, herself proposed the trip. The three dined in the open air on
Sherry's piazza and at eleven o'clock drove down the Avenue, to the east at
Washington Square, and through the Bowery.
"I never saw it before," said Marian, "and I must say I shall not care if I
never see it again. Why do people make so much fuss about slums, I wonder?"
"Oh, they're so queer, so like another world," suggested Mrs. Carnarvon.
"It gives you such a delightful sensation of sadness. It's just like a
not-too-melancholy play, only better because it's real. Then, too, it makes
one feel so much more comfortable and clean and contented in one's own
surroundings."
"You ought to be ashamed of yourself, Jessie." Marian spoke in mock
indignation. "The next thing we know you'll sink to being a patron of the
poor and go about enjoying yourself at making them self-conscious and
envious.
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