Dinna imaigin' it
was a public library. Na, na. It belonged to a grit an' gran'
hoose--the Lord hae respec till't, for it's no joke o' a hoose that--as
I weel kent afore a' was ower! Weel, I wrought awa', likin' the wark
weel, for a buik's the bonniest thing i' the warl' but ane, and there's
no dirl (thrill) in't whan ye lay han's upo' 't, as there is, guid
kens, in the ither. Man, ye had better lay han's upon a torpedo, or a
galvanic battery, nor upon a woman--I mean a woman that ye hae ony
attraction till--for she'll gar ye dirl till ye dinna ken yer thoomb
frae yer muckle tae. But I was speikin' aboot buiks an' no aboot women,
only somehoo whatever a man begins wi', he'll aye en' aff wi' the same
thing. The Lord hae a care o' them, for they're awfu' craters! They're
no like ither fowk a'thegither. Weel, ye see, I had a room till
mysel', forby the library an' my bedroom--an' a gran' place that was! I
didna see onything o' the family, for I had my denner and my wine and
'a thing human stammack cud desire served up till me i' my ain room.
But ae day, my denner was made up o' ae mess efter anither, vera fine
nae doot, but unco queer and ootlandish, and I had nae appeteet, and I
cudna eat it.
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