I don't
regret it for myself. But, of course, there are many public
causes one would have liked to help.
"If I can, I will come down to Beechcote on Saturday again.
Meanwhile, do let me urge you to take care of your health,
and not to dwell too much on a past that nothing can alter. I
understand, of course, how it must affect you; but I am sure
it will be best--best, indeed, for us both--that you should
now put it as much as possible out of your mind. It may not
be possible to hide the sad truth. I fear it will not be. But
I am sure that the less said--or even thought--about it, the
better. You won't think me unkind, will you?
"You will see a report of my speech in the debate to-morrow.
It certainly made an impression, and I must manage, if I can,
to stick to Parliament. But we will consult when we meet.
"Your most loving OLIVER."
As he wrote it Marsham had been uncomfortably conscious of another self
beside him--mocking, or critical.
"I don't regret it for myself." Pshaw! What was there to choose between
him and his mother? There, on his writing-table, lay a number of recent
bills, and some correspondence as to a Scotch moor he had persuaded his
mother to take for the coming season.
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