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Miller, J. R. (James Russell), 1840-1912

"Making the Most of Life"


Perhaps the very medicine they need is a glimpse of cheerful outlook.
Sick people ofttimes fall into a mood of disheartenment and self-pity
which seriously retards their recovery. To sit down beside them then,
and fall into their gloomy spirit, listening sympathetically to their
discouraged words, is to do them sore unkindness. The true office of
friendship in such cases is to drive away the discouragement, and put
hope and courage into the sore heart. We must try to make our sick
friend braver to endure his sufferings.
Then, even in the sacredness of sorrow, we should never forget that our
mission to others is not merely to weep with them, but to help them to
be victorious, to receive their sorrow as a messenger from God, and to
bear themselves as God's children under it. Instead, therefore, of
mere emotional condolence with our friends in their times of grief, we
should seek to present to them the strong comforts of divine love, and
to inspire them to the bearing of their sorrow in faith and hope and
joy.
So all personal helpfulness should be wise and thoughtful. It should
never tend to pamper weakness, to encourage dependence, to make people
timid, to debilitate manliness and womanliness, to make parasites of
those who turn to us with their burdens and needs. We must take care
that our helping does not dwarf any life which we ought rather to
stimulate to noble and beautiful growth.


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