And unless Thou, having made me see my infirmity didst
speedily admonish me either through the sight itself by some
contemplation to rise towards Thee, or altogether to despise and
pass it by, I dully stand fixed therein. What, when sitting at home, a
lizard catching flies, or a spider entangling them rushing into her
nets, oft-times takes my attention? Is the thing different, because
they are but small creatures? I go on from them to praise Thee the
wonderful Creator and Orderer of all, but this does not first draw
my attention. It is one thing to rise quickly, another not to fall.
And of such things is my life full; and my one hope is Thy wonderful
great mercy. For when our heart becomes the receptacle of such things,
and is overcharged with throngs of this abundant vanity, then are
our prayers also thereby often interrupted and distracted, and
whilst in Thy presence we direct the voice of our heart to Thine ears,
this so great concern is broken off by the rushing in of I know not
what idle thoughts. Shall we then account this also among things of
slight concernment, or shall aught bring us back to hope, save Thy
complete mercy, since Thou hast begun to change us?
And Thou knowest how far Thou hast already changed me, who first
healedst me of the lust of vindicating myself, that so Thou mightest
forgive all the rest of my iniquities, and heal all my infirmities,
and redeem life from corruption, and crown me with mercy and pity, and
satisfy my desire with good things: who didst curb my pride with Thy
fear, and tame my neck to Thy yoke.
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