She
had led a life of affection and gentleness, and in her last hours, when
about to carry to the grave a belief in the delight of a calm life, a
voice shouted to her that all was falsehood and all crime.
The veil being rent, she perceived apart from the love and friendship
which was all she had hitherto been able to see, a frightful picture of
blood and shame. She would have cursed the Almighty had she been able to
shout out a blasphemy. Providence had deceived her for over sixty years,
by treating her as a gentle, good little girl, by amusing her with
lying representations of tranquil joy. And she had remained a child,
senselessly believing in a thousand silly things, and unable to see life
as it really is, dragging along in the sanguinary filth of passions.
Providence was bad; it should have told her the truth before, or have
allowed her to continue in her innocence and blindness. Now, it only
remained for her to die, denying love, denying friendship, denying
devotedness. Nothing existed but murder and lust.
What! Camille had been killed by Therese and Laurent, and they had
conceived the crime in shame! For Madame Raquin, there was such a
fathomless depth in this thought, that she could neither reason it
out, nor grasp it clearly.
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